What if I can't stand it?

Yesterday I was taught a lesson by my sweet 7 year old. He was planning on taking a karate class with 2 of his friends. I hadn't quite decided if I wanted to put him in the class, so when I finally made the decision the class was full. When I told Dallin, he collapsed in tears. He was so disappointed and was just bawling. I gave him my spiel about having a good attitude and how life doesn't always work out like you plan. He then said,
" How can I have a good attitude? What if I just can't stand it?"

All of a sudden, I didn't know what to say.

One of my weaknesses is my inability to deal with disappointment. I feel like I have a positive attitude in general, almost to the extreme. I decide how certain events are going to turn out, always assuming the best, and then when they don't turn out as planned, I too have collapsed in tears on many occasions. This is not going to be his last experience with a bummer situation and I guess I better learn now how I am going to help him through these. I am working on this on my own, and now my son will join me in my learning.

Any advice? For me and for him...

Happy 7th Birthday, Dallin!

7 years ago today my life was changed forever. I became a mother! It did not go the way I imagined, but I instantly fell in love with this tiny little version of Jeff. (Look at those little legs!) As they wheeled me into the OR for my C-section, my dr. said, "I am sure this is a big baby and that's why we are having a hard time getting him out." As they pulled out my scrawny 21 inch, 6 lb 1 oz baby, he could have never been more wrong. I was scared to take care of him, afraid I would break him, but I am so grateful he was little as I feel like I got extra cuddle time with him. The C-section was a disappointment when they first told me, but I was just glad to have a healthy baby to hold. My mom wouldn't be coming for 10 days and I was terrified of my recovery, so I actually listened to the Dr. when he said to take it easy for the first 2 weeks. It was the best advice I was ever given. I enjoyed every moment with my new little baby. I never regretted how much I held him and played with him and cuddled him. I learned that dishes could wait, the bed didn't always need to be made, and the most important part of my day was with Dallin. I am so grateful for this perspective I had with him. As I struggled with infertility before baby #2 I am glad I was able to build a strong relationship with Dallin. He is a sweet little boy who has blessed my life for 7 years. Here are some things about Dallin:

1. He would never hurt anyone. I love that I don't worry about him getting in trouble. I can feel comfortable leaving him anywhere. That is just the demeanor he was born with-just like his dad.
2. He loves to learn. From a young age I have enjoyed teaching him random things because he memorized pretty quickly. It was a game that I would try to surprise Jeff with the things that Dallin would do. (It still is!)
3. He is very conscientious and follows rules exactly. He is also good at correcting others when they aren't following the rules. (including me.) One of my favorite stories was just at student conference on Friday his teacher told me that she gives Dallin the spelling list to double check for her before she photocopies it for the class. Too cute!
4. His level of focus. He gets on one thing and hyperfocuses. It's all he wants to do over and over and over...right now it is Tetherball! When it is rainy they don't get to go outside to play and he comes home in tears. I told him this is going to be a long winter, and that's when I decided his birthday present would be a tetherball.
5. He is getting sassy. I am not always happy about this but I love seeing the spunk to his personality and watching his sense of humor grow. When he was a baby it was hard work getting him to smile, but oh so rewarding!
6. I love watching him with his friends. He has been lucky to grow up with very good buddies since he was a baby. (I am lucky for this too. Their moms are some of my best friends!)
7. I feel a special closeness to him. It makes me grateful I had the C-section. If I hadn't I think I would have been quicker to be up and doing things. I enjoyed each aspect of watching him learn and grow. I miss the time I had with him and I hope he knows how much I love and treasure him.


































































































































We did not do a birthday party this year, but decided to have a playdate with some boys that he doesn't get to see much anymore thanks to school. They played some basketball, traded Pokemon cards and just enjoyed being boys. It was fun watching them play Guitar Hero and I was very proud that Dallin knows every word to "Eye of the Tiger." Makes a mom proud!









































We surprised him with the tetherball court and he played all day. We could barely get him out of the house to go to Chuck E. Cheese. We went there with just our little family and had a great time together.

Today his birthday weekend continued as we ate cake and ice cream during half time of the football game. I hope his day was special! We had a great time. We are grateful for the presents that were sent and the phone calls he received. He knows how loved he is!

Rest of Christmas Vacation!

Merry Christmas! Since I didn't send out cards this year, here is our family pic! I love getting Christmas cards and I didn't get to it this year. Please don't cross me off your list. :-)

I only posted about the first half of our trip. We were lucky enough to see both families over this Christmas holiday. We were also snowed in both places, so no, we weren't able to escape the Oregon snow as many people thought! It was a lot of driving, but for the most part, the kids were great. Bryce enjoyed it about as much as you would expect from a 19 month old! Luckily the other 2 were good sports.

So, here are some more highlights from our trip to end 2008.

***I am just trying to get some pics up for my mom! As soon as I am ready to start posting 2009, I will backdate this and make a new post! Enjoy!***

1. Spending time with Grandma Nise
2. Playing in the snow on New Years' Day. This is my idea of fun sledding! Being pulled by a snowmobile-no hill to climb. The kids (and adults!) loved it. And of course, nothing like finishing with hot chocolate.



3. Kids playing with their cousins. They love Grandma's toy room!
4. Spending time with Grandma and Grandpa Marker.
5. Enjoying the lights at Temple Square.
6. Riding the Frontrunner with Matt and Trish and kids.

7. (This is from the California part of the trip, but I am too tired to renumber it!) We went to see Christmas lights with great friends! Only bad part was it was the day after Christmas and I think the failing economy made half the houses decide not to continue turning on their lights...)


So, we were in the car for a total of 30 hours-crazy! We did hit traffic to Las Vegas that was not very fun, but we were grateful to have a safe trip. On the way to Ogden, it was about 2am and we were 2 hours from Grandma's when Bryce decided to throw up. We pulled into a gas station, cleaned him up and kept going. The kids woke up and watched one more movie. :-) On the way back to Portland, all was going well, until we were rear ended 10 minutes from home. What a way to end the trip.

All in all, we feel so lucky that we were able to see and play with each and every cousin this Christmas! We love you all!

Merry Christmas!!!!

Times like this are when blogging feels a little overwhelming. I want to write about the good times and the hard, but I don't always know how to put it into words. So, I will put up a few pictures.

Top 11 moments of vacation (good and bad!) so far...

1. Bryce screaming for hours in the car.
2. Visiting with a good friend who I have met through this blogging world, and getting to go for a run with her.

3. Taking Emily and her 2 sweet cousins to Nutcracker and watching Emily's face as she dreams of being on stage.

4. Bowling with the fam.

5. Watching Bryce very happy with family around- also watching him dive bomb off everthing-the couch, the pack n play, the bed, you name it!
6. Playing in the snow with kids.

7. Teaming with Erik and beating Jeff and Tony at Taboo.
8. Getting beat by Jeff at Settler's and Chess.
9. Going for 2 runs with Jeff.
10. Enjoying Christmas with the whole family-just being together. (All my siblings and their families are here.)

11. Knowing that there is one person missing.
I hope you are all enjoying your Christmas. I am glad to be reminded of the most important things:family and friends. I am grateful to remember the Savior and that he made it possible for me to be with my loved ones forever.

Edited to add: I am not sure why all the pictures were blurry. They looked great before I resized them!

The Locals are getting Restless...

This was my day today. (Snow Day #4)

I am the Scholastic book lady for Dallin's class. The books for December arrived at the school on Monday. Problem-we haven't been in school for 3 days. Dallin's nice principal drove them to my house today, so I have less than 24 hours to get them out to everyone before I leave. (There aren't too many books, not a huge deal.) So, as I am typing up the orders, I leave Bryce alone, where I don't realize he has access to the art closet. This is what I find.
Then, later in the day I decide to try to be craftsy with my kids and we follow Sarah's idea and attempt ornaments and nativities. It went alright. The dough was crumbly (which I couldn't figure out how to fix) so it wasn't that easy for the kids to work with. They did however manage a cute Pikachu and Mermaid figure! I would give me a B- for this project.

Last thing. Neighbor gifts. I have the bags and tags and I really wanted to make candy. We decided to make peanut butter balls. We had a really fun time, except I messed up the chocolate somehow and the dipping didn't quite work. So, we decided to give it up this year. Neighbors and friends, if you are reading this, we love you, it just didn't happen this year. We tried! I get at least a D for effort on this one.

One of the reasons we are dropping cable

We had Dish Network when we first moved to Oregon 8 years ago. We realized pretty quickly that we would watch too much TV. So, we canceled it and went to rabbit ears. This worked very well, and in fact when we bought Tivo 4 years ago the joke was that we were Tivo'ing local channels! We finally moved up to the $10 basic cable. Dallin has been begging us for "Cartoon Network" and when we bought FIOS because our DSL wasn't working, we thought it wouldn't be much more for cable. So, we have enjoyed it for 2 months. The kids have loved it, and I will admit, I have enjoyed my little obsession show, "What not to Wear."

The fact is, I feel like all I do is fight the kids to do anything else but watch TV. (It doesn't help that the snowstorm forced us inside for the last 4 days straight!) We are also trying to follow the Total Money Makeover and of course cable has ended up costing more than they said. So, we decided to cancel it. The kids are disappointed, but I am excited for them to learn something other than the Pokemon theme song.

Let it Snow, let it snow, let it snow!

Dallin has spent hours this weekend making snowflakes and taping them up all over our house. His teacher had told the class that the more snowflakes you had up, the better chance you had that it would snow.

Well, it really doesn't snow much where we live. Weather forecasters said there was a chance of snow this weekend, but you never know.

This morning, Dallin ran into our room saying, "I told you it would work! It's snowing!" So, we found out church was cancelled and we pulled some version of snow clothes together and headed outside. Bryce loved the sled that is his side. Dallin and Emily just loved playing. I am sure we will be out there later to build a snowman.