Thursday, November 08, 2007

Grateful

As I contemplate tomorrow and seeing my father, I can only think of all the many blessings I have been given, especially at this time. When he was diagnosed with brain cancer 2 1/2 years ago, we were all very shocked and scared. We were very lucky that he had a great 2 years where he was able to travel and felt good overall. These last 6 months have not been so good. However, I have noticed that he has been able to accept each loss of function with dignity and humility. He knows that it is part of the process, and still keeps his amazing attitude. I feel honored that he is my father and I am thankful for all that I have learned from him. I hope he knows how much I love him and I look forward to spending more time with and hopefully I will be able to help make some of his last days comfortable and enjoyable. When I visited him in September it was extremely humbling to help him walk, knowing that he had done the same for me when I was a toddler. All of the kindness and selfless service he has given me, I feel it such a small token in return to be there for him.

Now I am grateful for all of the people who make it possible to be here with him at this time.

Jeff- My wonderful husband who has tried to do all he can to support my need to be with my family at this time. It is such a busy time for him at work, but he also felt that Dallin should stay with him.

Friends- I was overwhelmed with gratitude when everyone jumped in to help take care of Dallin. We are so lucky to have people that we love and trust to help watch him while Jeff is at work. Dallin is very excited to have 2 weeks of playdates. (He kept asking me when I was leaving, which I will admit made me a little sad, but it also lets me know he will be fine.) Even as I was getting ready to leave I was getting phone calls asking what they could do to help. My feelings have been very close to the surface lately, and so I have a hard time talking about my father. My friends have all been very understanding.

Well, it is late, and the baby will be up in a few hours. This is a really good time for me to be doing this challenge. I still owe some commenters some "love" but I am having difficulty posting comments on this computer, so be patient with me!!

5 comments:

Suzie Petunia said...

I've never known anyone like you. How did you get to be so strong? I am so lucky you are my friend! I'm thinking of you.

JP said...

Sending a little love and hugs your way.

What a special daughter you are...

MarysMom said...

I FELT the love you have for your father. I had to stop reading or my daughter would ask why I have tears in my eyes. MY dad is my no. 1 support, especially of my writing and my blog and I can't imagine...
Anyway, cherish your time with him.

foxontherun said...

Just thinking of you. You are an inspiration. Enjoy this time!

katie said...

The bad part about not living near anymore. I did not realize that your dad was sick, nor did I realize that you are there for what sounds like his last days. Reading your post is awesome. You are strong, but to hear you talk about how now you get to give to him. I hope the next couple of weeks are able to see every day the tender mercies, write them down, share them. You are in my thoughts.